Best Mother's Day Gifts
Mom. It means something different to everyone. Of course, now that I'm a mother, I see motherhood as something different than I used to. Motherhood is nothing if not complicated. At this point with a 14, 10 and 9 year old, I have determined it is just like the rest of life: Messy & Beautiful. So let's talk about it... what's the best gift for a mom? I don't always love Mother's Day. There. I said it. It kinda feels like a reminder of my shortcomings, my failings, and all that I should be- but I'm not.
That mom who LOVES, DOTES and GUSHES over every moment is, well, not me. I'm the mom that forgets. I forget to see the humor in the difficulty. I forget to take advantage of "teaching moments." I forget to listen really listen when they are talking about the little things- and I forget if I don't listen to the little things in the future they won't tell me about the big things. I'm the mom that doesn't know. Is it a gift or a curse that I don't have "life's answers?" I was brought up in a world of more (perceived) certainty than my boys are being raised in. I don't know. What is the right thing to think or believe? I can't really tell you son. I can tell you kindness, love and learning are some of our family values. I don't know the answers, but I will ask YOU son- what do you believe? What life do you want to build? I can also tell you we will be here, and I will show up in all my imperfection and "unknowingness"... I'm the mom who has to take time for me. I learned a few years ago that 2 things are VITAL to my "surthriving" as a mother and wife.
I hear you- I see what you are saying to me, but what you don't understand is that I'm teaching my kids that while I am their mother, I am also a PERSON. I want to live my life as a mother, not a martyr and I have built my life like that. I'm the mom who yells. I'm the mom who TRIES not to yell, but I do. You know? It's not all bad. I'm the mom who yells "WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING?" and I'm also the mom who yells "OH MY GOSH! YOU DID IT!" {Insert embarrassing dance party here } is it ok? Probably not. I'm also the mom who swears. Again, I'm going to justify by saying while sometimes I say "Dammit" I also tell my teenage son he's a "Badass." Does it even out? I'm going with yes. (Maybe not, but, my son really is a total sweetheart and badass- best of both worlds.) Oh goodness. I'm the mom who will have regrets. Just like every mom. I will regret some of the things I do and say and also the things I didn't do or didn't say. Isn't that the complicated part about being a mama? We don't get to choose. We don't get to choose that they remember when we rubbed their back and told them they were amazing. They'll probably remember when I said "I'm gonna FREAK OUT if you don't stop it with that sound!!!" GAH! Why don't I get to choose??? I'm also the mom who comes from a good mama. I know that not everyone has this privilege. And, I'm grateful. My mom taught me all the things you guys! She is one of the bravest, strongest women I know. You know what? She really does show up and love me no matter what. Want to know how I know? I've tested it! (In my teens and in my 30's... sorry mom!) She shows up. When I'm worried about my kiddo being sick. She shows up. When I am sad and overwhelmed- she shows up. When she wants to beat me because "what the hell am I doing?" SHE. STILL. SHOWS. UP. Really, I think that's the best thing we can be. The mom who shows up and says "I'll be here. Always. No matter what." So what do you get your mom for Mother's Day? Hell if I know! But, maybe... Tell her something nice that you remember. Give her some time. Show her something she taught you. Pssst...You could also give her some Posh and pamper the heck outta her :) #shamelessplug Thanks mom! Now that I'm a mom, I know. It's complicated. Thanks for still showing up.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Me:Hi All! I'm Shanae. This is my blog all about mompreneuring! My passion is living life intentionally (which means, most of the time) differently! This is where I like to chat about "the hustle!" Work- Grow- Live & LOVE. Archives
January 2021
Categories |